Unfortunately this is something i do quite often. The lack of authority in my life twinned with the drinking, the laziness, the gambling and the rest of all that great stuff makes it hard for me to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I really feel like i have a good idea of how i want my life to be. Eating healthy, regular exercise, reading, writing, learning etc etc. The truth of the matter is it's 4am, I've watched 8 hours of shit on TV today and managed to work my way through an entire tub of ice cream. Now i know these are impressive accomplishments in themselves but i think i could be doing better.
It will always come down to the fact that I'm lazy. The worst thing about my laziness is my acceptance of it. I've been lazy my whole life and to be honest I've never really understood why people spend so much time doing things they don't want to. I like to do what i want, when i want and for a large percentage of my time that means relaxing in comfort.
The game of poker has been both good and bad for my natural laziness. On the plus side it gives me something to work on, makes me concentrate and challenges me on a daily basis. On the other side of the coin it's created a way for me to make quite a lot of money with not much effort. I'm 23, have no degree and 'work' an average of 15-20 hours a week. The sick thing about this little story is i make more than most Oxbridge graduates my age and i don't pay tax. I don't want this post to turn into a shameless brag but for a lazy fucker I'm doing OK for myself.
I'm sure a time will come when I'll have to think about making some major changes in my life. When that time does arrive i want it to be through choice and not have been forced from going broke. The idea of busting my roll is petrifying. The scariest thing about it for me is the idea of trying and failing at something. I'm use to mediocrity. I was mediocre at school and I've always been a mediocre sportsman. The reason I'm OK with this is the reason behind it. I never worked hard at school and I've never really worked hard at sport. What i have worked hard on is poker. If i went broke i know my family and friends would help me through but I'm not sure i could ever get over trying and failing at something.
You'll be glad to hear that's the soul revealing, philosophical side of the blog done. I never really plan what I'm going to write on this page and sometimes things just spill out. Back to my recent poker activity:
Live poker sucks! I played 4 events at the London poker masters and cashed in none. On top of that i lost £750 playing cash and another £130 staking, what a superstar! The grand total for the festival came to a loss of £1980 so overall not a good week. As far as decisions go i did quite well. If i had to grade my performance at the festival i would give me a B-. I still pushed a little to hard at times and my timing/live reads were not very good at all. As is the current trend with my live outings i did tend to run into a lot of hands. It's so hard to get momentum going in a tourney when you can't make hands and your opponents keep making the nuts. Really hoping i can save all my run good for one tournament and ship something big.
After a 10 day break from online poker I've been back on it this week. Glad to report I'm +$5K from the first 4 days. Most of that came from one guy on party that sucks hairy man cock. My heads up game is getting really strong and I'm still improving. Planning on playing online quite a bit for the next couple of weeks then I'm playing the GUKPT at the Vic at the end of the month. Hugs and Kisses xxxxxxxxxxxx
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